


How well did you really know me?

by Songofpsalms297



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: F/M, Former Bianca/Varric
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-05
Updated: 2018-08-05
Packaged: 2019-06-22 11:29:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 911
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15580983
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Songofpsalms297/pseuds/Songofpsalms297
Summary: Bianca realizes her relationship with Varric is on the cusp of destruction due to her actions at Bartrand's Folly and after. She remains hopeful, until a letter from Varric arrives.





	How well did you really know me?

**Author's Note:**

> Again, not sure what happened with this one. I was gonna write some fluff, but what follows isn't fluffy. Be forewarned. But I still hope you like it. :D

She grieves. She knows things cannot ever truly be the same between them. Not after what has passed. Not after so much has been left unsaid. Undone. Ancestors take her heart this time, they are undone.  
His is the hand she never looked for, never realized just how much she cherished his warm fingers until they were no longer hers to grasp.  
His heart the steady beat by which she danced, until he took it from her hearing, and she stumbles now. Steps, out of time.  
His joy at their meetings, a delightful aperitif before their banquet of indulgences. His love a river she would bask in. Truth be told, she'd never expected it's loss. And all at once.  
She'd blustered her threats to the woman in charge of his Inquisition. But only to cover her bleeding heart. They both knew if she looked his way, she would see the final death knell of their 15 years.  
She was a Davri. She'd thrown her threat to the universe. Not just the ginger elf, or the glaring human female. She'd gotten over this kind of pain before. She'd just channel it into production and design. She'd make something, maybe his heart would be a bit less hard toward her. And she would wait, biding her time until she could invite him to meet with her again.  
\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
Months later a package is delivered to Val Royeaux. It's wrapping puzzles her, she'd not ordered any components from the Free Marches lately. Maybe--, now eager fingers tear through the parchment. Her heart catches, stuttered joy, Oh!  
She recognizes the wrapping for the sight she'd crafted for her namesake. One that would showcase his skill and accuracy. She'd also included a special recipe for a new gear oil she'd discovered worked especially well with the silverite gears she preferred.  
Her brow marrs in confusion when she sees the letter. The handwriting isn't familiar to her, but she opens it anyway. She smiles as a second parchment falls away from the first to the floor. Recognizing the handwriting from thousands of love notes, she abandons the unfamiliar for the familiar. As she reads, she wishes she hadn't.

  
_"Bianca. I'm never sure how to address these things so I'll be brief. I'm doing this so Cassandra'll leave me alone about it. She says "Closure" is a good thing for all parties involved, but. Thanks for the gear oil, but Hero has a supplier I've grown fond of using. I'm returning it and the sight to you. Just to be crystal clear. I'm done. We're done. Not that I think you've spent any time at all even thinking about the end of our 15 year affair. I'm sure you've already filled in the time of our "stolen moments" with projects, What's-his-name, and family meetings. That's good, actually. I just wanted to let you know, I'm moving on too._  
_You see, I've met someone. She's-, Andraste's ass she pisses me off, and sets me afire in ways I never knew were possible. She reminds me of happy times with my family of all things. She's home, Bianca. In the same way, I think Bogdan is for you too if you'll let him. I think you and I became this_ Jouliana _and Rodrigo in our own minds._  
_I've asked her to marry me. A human. All long legs and fire. And she's said yes. I'm a bit nervous that_ this'll _be a repeat of, well, our date 15 years ago in Kirkwall. But I think I have more of her heart than you were able to give to me. I don't blame you. I'm actually, well this is going to sound nug-shit crazy, but I'm grateful to you Bianca. If not for you, I wouldn't' be here._  
_And she's got a heart the size of Thedas. She understands, doesn't pass judgment, like most of those Chantry types. In fact, she's snoozing in my chair as I write this. She refused to marry me if I didn't send you and Bogdan an invitation. She wants to stand up before the whole of Thedas and bless you both for bringing us together._  
_She wants you to come to our wedding. All I ask is, don't. Don't come. Don't reply. Let her think this got lost on the way somewhere. After what you did, how you lied, so many innocents have died, Bianca. In fucking agony. Because of what_ Bartrand _and I found in that damned_ thaig _. Because of what you gave to Corypheus. Don't._  
_The fact that you made a sight out of red_ lyrium _, Bianca. I don't even know what to do with that level of shit._  
_It's your choice whether or not you show. I won't throw you out, and Cassandra would be beyond delighted to chat with you and Bogdan. But I can't promise I'd be civil to either of you. And I won't spoil her day like that. So please burn the enclosed wedding invitation. And just don't._  
_Signed,_  
_Varric Tethras"_

  
Her heart breaks. Tears freely streaking down her face, marring the ink his rejection is written in. It blurs and runs through the writing on the second letter. Swiping her thumb through the black tears, she destroys his signature first. And in fury shreds all. She hurtles the bits of parchment into her kiln, roughly grabs the package she'd so lovingly made, cocks her arm getting ready to smash it to bloody bits, her rage coloring her vision.


End file.
